Sunday, February 22, 2009

Little Girls and Their Daddys

Last weekend all of my sisters came to church on Sunday so that we could be with Mom, whose birthday had been the previous week. Sitting in church, I looked over to see Destiny with her arm linked in Dad's. It struck me at that moment that her relationship with him is so different from mine.

I've always loved Daddy, but we never really had a close relationship. Destiny, though, is completely different. She's never felt awkward about climbing in his lap (I'd kill the poor man!) or giving him hugs and kisses. Shouldn't it be that way? But that's definitely not how I feel, or how I remember ever feeling as a young girl.

Families show affection from day one, and I guess that determines how it will be from then on out. I know that Destiny is probably more comfortable with most males than she is with females, whereas I'm the complete opposite. With girlfriends I'm outgoing and fun and laugh and just have a great time. With most males, it's not the same at all. That's not to say that there's not the exception to the rule now and then, but overall, the stiff, uncomfortable relationship I have with Dad is similar to the one I foster with most other males.

I think it was Freud who first said that boys want to grow up and marry someone like their mothers and that girls want to grow up and marry someone like their fathers. It makes sense in some situations, I suppose. I definitely look for traits similar to the ones I've always respected in my dad- honest, intelligent, hard-working, fun-loving, faithful, a Christian... But I'm looking for other traits too- affectionate, enjoys the arts, sociable, laid-back...

I love my dad sooo much... I still call him Daddy most of the time. I think he's handsome, with the prettiest blue eyes in the universe. He's so talented with woodworking, and he's a very steadfast person in both his beliefs and his actions. I don't question his love for me either, not one tiny little bit. But I'm 33 years old and still long for the kind of relationship with him that my baby sister has- one where I can sit beside him in church and put my arm through his and not even give it a second thought.

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